Monday, May 3, 2010

The Rules For Watching A No-Hitter (AKA No-Hit Club)


By
If things stay the course, one of these days a Blue Jays starter is going to toss a no-hitter.

For the fourth time since the beginning of the season, a Blue Jay starter made it through six innings without surrendering a single hit.

So just in case it happens again in the near future, I thought I'd lay down some ground rules just in case. Here are the rules of No-Hit Club:

1.) The first rule of No-Hit Club is you do not talk about a no-hitter.

2.) The second rule of No-Hit Club is seriously ... do not talk about a no-hitter (that means you, Buck Martinez and Alan Ashby).

3.) Do not mention how the opposing team has a zero in the column which is situated between runs and errors.

4.) You are allowed to think positive thoughts, but try your best not to verbalize any of them. Save the celebrations for after the twenty-seventh out.

5.) If you started watching or listening to a no-hitter, you must keep watching or listening to the game throughout said no-hitter. One wouldn't want to upset the Baseball Gods.

6 comments:

  1. but if i turn on the radio after, say, 4 innings, i might unwittingly disobey rule 5, because i won't know what's happening due to rules 1 and 2...

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  2. I think ignorance is ok. It is once you have come to the realization that there is a no-hitter/perfect game in progress that there is no turning back.

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  3. btc, interesting conundrum. In my opinion, if you aren't aware a no-hitter is in progress, then it's okay to tune out. But if you do find out, you are obligated to stick with it.

    Matt C, these are all just silly rituals but I wouldn't ever dare to mention the thing that shall not be mentioned during a game.

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  4. Yea Ian,

    That is what I was trying to imply, apparently my comment wasn't to clear. I didn't mean it was ok to talk about the nono, I meant what you so eloquently stated in your response to btc.

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  5. It's all good Matt, we're definetely on the same page. But I'll take a near no hitter over nothing any day.

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  6. There are no rules in no-hit club.

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